The Downfall of Google

Google is pretty frickin’ awesome. It’s a fact. If you’re lucky like me and live near their main campus (yes, that’s what they call it) and have had the fortunate opportunity to go there, then you know how cool it is. You can ride around on vespas and it’s got all sorts of fun games everywhere and colors and fun gardens and randomness. And free food. Lots of free food. When you’re college-aged, they don’t even look twice at you. Everyone there looks like they’re in college, or maybe just recently graduated. It’s amazing.

But I am worried about them.

I think that someone is sucking the humor out of Google. Maybe the professors have come back and are trying to whip them back into line. I’m not entirely sure. All I know is that you used to be able to search things and get clever responses, and now you can’t.

There was a brief time span when you could search “WMD” with the “I’m Feeling Lucky” option and the page that came up was one of those “404 not found” ones. Google-ized, of course, so you knew it was a joke. And then for a while you could search “Chuck Norris,” and the page came back with, “You can’t search for Chuck Norris. He finds you.” And you used to be able to search directions from NY or San Francisco to London, and it would give you directions to the edge of Manhattan and then it said, “Swim across the Atlantic Ocean,” and listed the number of miles until you got to Britain, then continuing with driving directions to London.

None of these exist anymore. I even searched a few other keywords and directions I thought might be fodder for the clever Google-ites, but no luck. Is someone sucking their soul out? Keep your eyes and ears open for a conspiracy.

In the meantime, if you know of any little jokes that have escaped the soul-sucking radar, please let me know!


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